SHE WASN'T INGRID

But she was attractive. She was popular. She was smart. She was in my American Lit class as a junior. And as she walked into my College Prep Writing class as a senior, I cringed.

You see, I couldn't stand her. How I'd gotten through one semester with her was amazing. Another thing you may find amazing is that looking back after 30 years of teaching high school students, there were only a handful that I felt that way about. Personality conflicts are bound to occur when being within close proximity of so many people, but I was fortunate that most of my students simply did what I said. And I could avert or divert the ones who were unwilling to.

The classical ones that make you grit your teeth when they come into your classroom make that challenging. And she was a challenge. Apart from a schedule change, which I knew she wouldn't initiate, I was stuck with her.

At the time, I didn't know it, but I used the "fake it, if you can't make it" approach utilized by C. S. Lewis. He said, "If you don't love someone, then act like you do. Eventually the feelings will catch up with your actions." But that's what I did. I went out of my way to act as if I liked her. When she would be disagreeable, I would laugh it off. Sometimes I would agree with her.

If she needed attention, and she often did, I gave it to her or allowed her to express her feelings. Oh, it was hard to fake it. Often times I wondered why I was doing it. But just as Mr. Lewis said, I actually didn't dread to see her walk through my doors.

The last memory I have of her is at a Prom I was chaperoning. She walked up to me in her blue dress (how do I remember that?) and said some nice things (that I don't remember). She was with her date and friends, and it just seemed so out of character for her to do that. I know it doesn't seem like much, and there's no moment of illumination here, but just maybe I had helped her. Maybe I would have made C.S. Lewis proud. All I know is, by acting as if I liked her, acting in Christian love worked for me. And my 6th hour class.