REWARDS NOW OR LATER OR BOTH

I never could get one. Some guys had them all strung together like military patches and bars that hung down impressively. One guy who used to show up for the last ten minutes of Sunday School, sometimes not even going into the class but just signing his name, had a ton of them. Then he would sleep in the balcony every Sunday. He had it down. He'd sit on the aisle, almost always alone. Prop his head against left palm and sack out, sometimes nearly falling into the aisle. He always knew when to awaken and leave the church service. And every year he would be rewarded by being called up in front of the church and received another perfect attendance award. I think he had 22 straight years.

But none, zero, nada, nil, nunco for me. Oh, I'd get close. I might make 48 or even 50, but some silly illness or something always knocked me out. Literally. I never had perfect attendance in school either. I really got close during my 8th grade year. I missed one day, but hey, as they say, that ain't perfect.

I took pride in the gold stars that showed our attendance record, displayed proudly in our Sunday School classroom. I was always embarrassed or ashamed if I had two misses in a row. Some guys had only a few stars for the quarter. They must have really been embarrassed. Maybe that's why they didn't come very often. Or ever.

So why are we so attached to rewards? Simple. We're about us and not God. Did I want the perfect attendance award to honor or glorify God? No. I wanted it as I wanted a bowling patch or a merit badge in Boy Scouts. I wanted a trophy. For me.

Looking back, that's probably why I never got it. But I never let anyone know how disappointed I was not to get the reward. You just didn't do that back then. Otherwise, one of my parents or teachers might have talked to me about priorities. I was probably even more guilty of pride than the sleeping guy in church. At least the Lord kept him healthy enough to get the reward. He served as an example. Not a good one, maybe, but God uses all kinds of people for all kinds of examples. I was just so full of pride that I fit in like a lot of others. No example there.

I felt good in church. Always have. I'm certain that I received more spiritual blessings than the sleepy one. But I didn't know what double-minded was then. I loved God. But my focus was "unstable in what [I] did". (James 1:8) I was shooting for God, but my aim was on me.

I didn't get my reward for perfect Sunday School attendance. But my reward will come from Heaven. What's more, it will be a crown, I pray. That will last for eternity. I don't even think the Sunday School bars that don't adorn it will be missed.